Still going SNYDERSTRONG

You may say I've been a little quiet lately, laying low not having chimed in on this blog in more than 6 months. These days, I'm trying to unplug a little more. And, I'm still largely trying to maintain every bit of normalcy I can everyday. I'm just plain burnt out and in a bit of a funk. But I'm sure we all experience times like that.

Maybe part of it is the pressure of writing a "blog"...keeping my grammar and punctuation in check, trying to find the right words to use.

Eh...who really cares. I'm just gonna keep it real.

If only I could freeze time

I caught a glance at this lovely picture Lily drew of the four of us. 

We must have 20 or more similar pictures drawn by both kiddos, all depicting the happy family of four. I wish it were like that all the time. I wish the four of us could be together forever this short time we have on Earth. I wish I could freeze time, and live in these precious moments forever, like:

Luke simply being Luke. The other day, he was sitting on the grass in front of our pond, pulling one blade at a time and just looking off into the distance. He still comes to my room to give me a kiss any time he's woken himself up in the middle of the night to go to the potty. And his smile with his left dimple just melts my heart.

The look of true love in Lily's eyes when she's hugging her brother, or holding one of her cousins. It's a special look of adoration that only makes an appearance with her brother and cousins. It's simply precious.

The look Christian gives me when one of the kids does something cute, funny, or impressive...the sparkle in his eyes that makes him the proud daddy he is brings a big smile to my face.

But plans are not up to me. Just like my kids sing "Let it go" from the movie Frozen 24/7, I'm learning to let go and let God. It's not easy to give up control. I simply dwell in His presence and let Him lead and guide me.

However, just because I have to let go of my own plans doesn't mean I can't still dream big and pray big too.

Bottom line is that I'm trying. I fall short each and every day, but I pick myself up again and keep on trying. Do I let guilt or doubt get in the way? Sometimes. Do I give in to worldliness? Yes, too often. But by God's grace, I'm forgiven. I can take all my earthly burdens to the cross, and be set free.

Back to the pictures of the happy family of four. I think I'll ask Lily next time to draw a picture of the four of us in Heaven together. That's where I want to put all my hope.

Updates on Christian

Christian has been back to work for a couple months now. He's doing remarkably well managing any side effects and maintaining enough energy to put a full work day in. He does get a bit more rest than he used to, so fatigue would be the greatest side effect he's challenged with, along with some nausea. He does like to show off his new hair, white as snow. 

Christian's next CT scan is May 15. His dosage was increased last month after some tests showed a little bit of growth, so we pray this increase in meds does the work on shrinking the lesions in his lungs with minimal damage to the rest of his body.

Please pray boldly that the results of these May 15 tests show great progress in killing off cancer cells, and that no new growth is detected!

Updates on the kids

Lily has three weeks remaining of 1st grade! Luke still attends preschool two days a week. They are both playing t-ball this Spring and are a blast to watch from the sidelines! They both love to read and are really into Legos right now. They are wonderful blessings! Lily is getting excited for her 2nd annual lemonade stand this Saturday. More to come on that.

Updates on me

I'm so thankful to be at home full time caring for my family right now. I think that losing my part-time job in December involved some divine intervention. I'm where I need to be at the present time. I am so grateful that Christian is thriving with his career and loves his job and colleagues so that I'm able to stay home with the kids. I'm especially looking forward to spending the summer off with them! It'll also be nice having a bit of a break from dropping Lily off at school each morning, because that child is very slow moving in the morning! 

"Balance" is the word/motto I focus on each day. I strive to balance priorities, making sure I'm spending quality time with my family, getting a little "me time" in, trying to spend more time in prayer, getting the bare minimum done around the house. It's a juggling act most of the time, but all in all I think I'm doing a pretty good job.

Thank you, always, for your kind thoughts, prayers, and support!

We remain Snyderstrong!
Keri  

"Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things."

-Colossians 3:2